Sometimes I wonder if anything's absolute anymore. Is there still right and wrong? Good and bad? Truth and lies? Or is everything negotiable, left to interpretation, gray. Sometimes we're forced to bend the truth, transform it, cause we're faced with things that are not of our own making. And sometimes things simply catch up to us.
Today the truth came to me. I'm not really sure what to think of it now or what to do now. I guess I'm just trying to figure everything out still. It still hurts and I'm kinda worried about what dreams may come over the next few days and weeks because of this.
Truth is still absolute. Believe that. Even when that truth is hard and cold, and more painful than you've ever imagined. And even when truth is more cruel than any lie.
Life is pretty crazy when you think that sometimes it would have been better to be kept in the dark.. to just be able to believe the lies and go on believe that everything was real. That everything was true. That the feelings were mutual. But life doesn't really work that way. There aren't always happy endings and people don't always turn out to be the person you thought they were. The person they said they were.
And this time the truth was much more cruel than any lie you could have ever told me. But it's the truth. And I wanted to know it. And I got my answers. And now part of me wishes I could just go back and live in the lie. It was easier that way. I never asked for this. But here I am... back several steps and far from the place that I want to be.
Unless your heart, your soul, and your whole being are behind every decision you make, the words from your mouth will be empty, and each action will be meaningless. Truth and confidence are the roots of happiness.
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Sam -
ReplyDeleteRead this on Sunday, and thought of your post... I can take no credit... it was written by someone much smarter than myself:
"God is three persons who each have centers of action and have a dynamic and reciprocal relationship. And in any relationship, any reciprocity, there is need and vulnerability. There is openness to the other.
"In fact, it is this openness to the other that constitutes God as love. And it is this love that makes room for creation. And it is this love that leaves space for a free creation. And it is this love that marks itself as suffering, enduring love. As Moltmann said yesterday, God's power is not expressed by the fact that he controls all things (the opposite of love), but in that he bears all things and suffers all things. This is a game changer in so many ways.
"At the conference yesterday, people talked to Moltmann about how his book, The Crucified God, gave them a lease on life - new hope - in the most tragic of circumstances. The loss of an infant son, the persistent struggle of disability, the oppression related to class and race and gender. That's a pretty hefty theological legacy. I doubt Piper's theology has many stories like that. The answer to why in Piper's theology is always God, and that causes more problems than it solves. For Moltmann, there is no answer to the question why, and if there were it would not satisfy us. But in the crucified God there is a who and a where and a when related to suffering. There is a God who suffers all thigns, who lashes himself to a world on a cross, and whose resurrection will not allow suffering to be the last word."